By Jean Amery
Read Online or Download At the Mind's Limits: Contemplations by a Survivor on Auschwitz and Its Realities PDF
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Extra info for At the Mind's Limits: Contemplations by a Survivor on Auschwitz and Its Realities
O h yes, I know, I know. It is impossible to discuss here in detail the political “O p eration Bewilderment" of the postwar period, which defined Communism and National Socialism for us as two not even very different manifesta tions of one and the same thing. 6 As a hint, allow me to repeat here in my own name and at the risk of being denounced what Thomas Mann once said in a much attacked interview: namely, that no matter how terrible Communism may at times appear, it still symbolizes an idea of man, whereas HitlerFascism was not an idea at all, b ut depravity.
It was over for a while. It still is not over. Twenty-two years later I am still dangling over the ground by dislocated arms, panting, and accusing myself. ” Does one repress an unsightly birthmark? One can have it removed by a plastic surgeon, but the skin that is transplanted in its place is not the skin with which one feels naturally at case. One can shake off torture as little as the question of the possibilities Torture 37 and limits of the power to resist it. I have spoken with many comrades about this and have attempted to relive all kinds of experiences.
Thereafter I crossed so many borders illegally that even now it still seems strange and wondrous to me when I pass a customs post in my car, well provided with all the necessary travel papers. In the process, my heart always beats rather heavily, obeying a Pavlovian reflex. After we had arrived so “safely" in Antwerp and had confirmed this in a cable to the members of our family who had remained at home, we T he 41 42 At the M ind' s Limits exchanged the rest of our money, altogether fifteen marks and fifty pfen nigs, if I recall correctly.